Hi, I’m Melanie, a person with normal problems like everyone else. Things piss me off, drive me batty, and infuriate me so badly I find myself looking for the closest idiot to punch (I don’t actually punch people). When I need to vent I call or text a friend to get it off my chest, then I move on. I do NOT post it online for everyone to see.
I’ve talked before about my astonishment at what people post without thinking. Besides the fact that whatever you type in a moment of rage is there forever—we’re all aware of that—I wonder if these people realize that it also affects your relationships and the way people view you. I try to say something encouraging if it seems like a friend is upset, but if all you every do is complain, I tune you out pretty quickly.
But I’m not here to gripe. Today I’m going to show you how I turn crappy (this is subjective) things that happen to me, spin it in the writer-brain, and turn it into something that I hope is a little more entertaining.
What I said:
“I’m a girl. This is how I deal with problems.” (accompanied with this photo)
What I could have said (that actually happened):
A hornet invaded my air-tight living room and possibly stung my puppy.
What I said:
“We’ve arrived! Ranger Rick was very excited to see us.”
What I could have said:
When we arrived at our vacation destination, the security guards stopped us several times and made us drive to different offices before finally allowing us into the complex. The only benefit is one of them was hot.
What I said:
“Holy storm!”
What i could have said:
This storm is so bad we had to pull over in a rest stop and wait ten minutes before sprinting inside for breakfast. Then they didn’t have any power so we had to drive to another place THROUGH MORE RAIN before finally finding a place where we could eat. Not to mention my passenger had never experienced a Midwest storm before and was a little concerned we’d be swept up in a tornado.
What I said:
“Waiting for Turkey!”
What I could have said:
I couldn’t fall asleep last night and had to drag myself out of bed after less than five hours of sleep to go pick my friend up at the airport. Give me coffee…
What I said:
“TGIF has never been so true.”
What I could have said:
…
Some things are still better left unsaid. 🙂
Don’t think that using your “pause & think” button isn’t appreciated. 🙂
Loved the pic!
Thanks love. 🙂 I know it’s appreciated; now I must spread the word to those that don’t seem to get it.
Oops! My pause and think button is missing. Must go to Target.
Robin, I love your filter. 🙂
Wait, there is a pause and reflect button?
Where do I find said button. I shower pretty well and I have never found this button.
Where is the button………………?
I don’t think you’re looking in the right place.
My pause button works fine, but I think my think button must be broken.
That button is sooo very important.
What I say – “Hi, I’d like an ice cream please.”
What Newfoundlanders perceive I could have said – “Cor blimey, lawks alive, gertcha, cuppa tea anna scone.”
Not quite the same, I s’pose.
Adam
I got that a lot in Mexico. I’d say something in perfect Spanish and they’d do nothing but stare at the second head that’d apparently sprung from my neck. Very annoying.
I thought the second head was very pretty.
And, I would like to point out, I did not hear about any of the above mishaps (except the hornet) after I arrived myself with stories of rainstorms and misbehaving trucks. Your filter is still firmly in place. 🙂
Yay for filters! Yeah, your travel follies definitely outweighed ours. 🙂
*rears second head just for fun*
Stay positive my friend. I did my best Dos Equis man impersonation while typing that.
And that made me smile. Thank you.
Only the coolest of friends would pick up a turkey at the airport so early in the morning. 😉
I’m here for ya babe. 🙂
Ooo this is a good one. I completely agree ;o) I really try to keep my statuses positive. Great post!!
Thanks Erica!